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Monday, August 1, 2011

A Field Guide to Poli-Speak terminology

Our politicians have long since forgotten how to speak English. Rather, they now use a Political Gibberish Patois that employs a combination of pompous filler phrases with misused invective.

Designed on the principles of vagueness, imprecision, verbosity and outrage, this dialect still uses the English Language as a jumping off point, so their sentences still have some meaning, intentional or otherwise.

This should help to unravel some of the mysteries of Political Speak.

Some overused Polispeak terms:

Communism. Polispeak meaning: F*ing jerks. Real meaning: workers control the means of production. Historical precedent: None. In reality this is a theoretical term that describes a dream state that has never occurred and will never occur. Countries like China describe themselves as Communist. But they are a Central Bank run Oligopoly just like the United States.

Free market capitalism. Polispeak meaning: Awesomely cool. Real Meaning: An equal access to capital for all citizens to use in entering any and all businesses without barrier. Historical Precedent: None. In reality this is a theoretical term that describes a dream state that has never occurred and never will occur. Countries like the United States describe themselves as Free Market. But they are a Central Bank run Oligopoly just like China.

Fascism: Polispeak meaning: F*ing scary. So scary, in fact, that term is rarely used. Real meaning: Central Bank run Oligopoly.

Deficit Spending: Polispeak meaning: Evil waste. Real meaning: The manner in which the Central Bank and member banks create and control the flow of money.

Balance the Budget: Polispeak meaning: Saving America. Real meaning: fiddle with the meaningless edges of the budget so that excluding OFF BALANCE SHEET ITEMS like the 3 wars, the 100 trillion off balance sheet hole of unfunded liabilities, and the enormous Fed Slush Fund that feeds the banks, we can feel like we're slowing down spending - without, of course, raising any revenue.

Waste, Pork: Polispeak meaning: Washington excess. Real meaning: The spending other people do in other districts.

Class Warfare: Polispeak meaning: Mentioning, referencing or even noticing that there are poor people, rich people and middle class people in this country. Real meaning: there is no real meaning in a country where "subversive" is a tagline for a TV show.

Business Friendly, Less Regulation: Polispeak meaning: Doing Good Stuff for America. Real meaning: laying off the 5 Banks that own 60 percent of the assets in this country and control the flow and creation of money - because they'll be angry if we don't.

Other than these and a few other meaningless phrases, sentences are filled with Filler phrases that have absolutely no meaning other than to suggest "I'm really smart even if I sound like a rambling idiot." These include:

Let's be honest...
If I can be perfectly honest...
If you will...
If I may...
I must tell you....
Let me be perfectly clear...
I believe I've been very clear about this...
As I've been saying for months now...
Our side has been consistent all along....
If they're not willing to come to the table...
It's time for all sides to come to the table...
We've put forth a clear plan, it's time for them to put forth a plan...
The American people are clear about this...
The American people have spoken...
This is what I've been sent here to do....
I only answer to the American people...
Let's do it for our Children...
Let's do it for our Grandchildren...
Let's do it for generations to come....
And let's not forget: America is still the greatest country on God's Green Earth.

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